Tuesday, December 1, 2009

On An Abandoned Road

Dreams but dreamt now real.
Not quite what I imagined.
I used to enter these dreams frequently.
Now, not so much.
There exists all of my imaginings, stray stories.
He used to enter them frequently, back in April.
Then not at all.
Now He is back again.
Why do I dream of school and Him?
What does it mean to dream of abandonment?
You can only abandon that which you've possessed, cherished, defended or retained.
By that definition I cannot call this abandonment.
The ocean tide is shifting.
My confidence has been amplifying.
This makes me exuberant.
Over the past 3 years I have felt my independence wane.
I had become weak.
Gleefully I can say that my independence has reared its head again.
My strength has always come from within.
Liberation is within my grasp.
I can feel it against my fingertips.
I control my thoughts and emotions. They do not control me.
The more I am pushed, the more I rebel.
Stubborn.
Only I have lived my life.
Only I possess the ability to live this life.
Viva La Vie Boheme.